The Baby Whisperer.
I seem to have mystical powers over babies. That's right, I said it. And I could probably beat any baby at arm wrestling!
Last weekend we went to Sonic for lunch. While we were eating a guy shows up and tried to go inside. He then states "What kind of Sonic don't let you go inside?". I thought to myself "All of them?" So he goes to the outside order box and says "Give me 2 cups of that ice." After about 2 minutes a guy comes out with 2 cups of ice and tells him it'll be 76 cents, to which he replies "Oh, y'all got that good ice. That's alright, I got a little change in my pocket." He pays for the ice and leaves.
While this is going on a family shows up and sits at the table next to us. After a few minutes I sense a child walking up to our table. I quickly glare in his direction to let him know I did not want to be bothered. My glare quickly changes to a smile when I see he came over to give me a piece of candy. What's up with that? Random children are just giving me candy now.
Fast forward to today. Everyone here has errands to run so I headed over to Taco Bell by myself. A man shows up with a couple in there late teens and a cute little blonde haired blue eyed baby. Had to be less than a year old. They sat her with her back to me but she kept turning around to look at me. If I wasn't looking back, she would make a noise to attract my attention until I looked at her and smiled.
What none of you know is that I'm secretly building an army. I'm using my telepathic powers to control these children, then 20 years from now I will send out a signal and take over the world.
What? The secret is out? Did I just say it out loud? Oh, um, I was just kidding. None of that is going to happen. I promise.
Last weekend we went to Sonic for lunch. While we were eating a guy shows up and tried to go inside. He then states "What kind of Sonic don't let you go inside?". I thought to myself "All of them?" So he goes to the outside order box and says "Give me 2 cups of that ice." After about 2 minutes a guy comes out with 2 cups of ice and tells him it'll be 76 cents, to which he replies "Oh, y'all got that good ice. That's alright, I got a little change in my pocket." He pays for the ice and leaves.
While this is going on a family shows up and sits at the table next to us. After a few minutes I sense a child walking up to our table. I quickly glare in his direction to let him know I did not want to be bothered. My glare quickly changes to a smile when I see he came over to give me a piece of candy. What's up with that? Random children are just giving me candy now.
Fast forward to today. Everyone here has errands to run so I headed over to Taco Bell by myself. A man shows up with a couple in there late teens and a cute little blonde haired blue eyed baby. Had to be less than a year old. They sat her with her back to me but she kept turning around to look at me. If I wasn't looking back, she would make a noise to attract my attention until I looked at her and smiled.
What none of you know is that I'm secretly building an army. I'm using my telepathic powers to control these children, then 20 years from now I will send out a signal and take over the world.
What? The secret is out? Did I just say it out loud? Oh, um, I was just kidding. None of that is going to happen. I promise.
posted by H1 @ 1:58 PM
3 Comments:
It's true - I've seen you in action...babies and dogs.
Great...Great...I have three of them that are packing their bags to join you as you read this!!!!! Send them back when they are done with their shinanigans!!!!
That kid was SOOOO happy to give you his candy.
My favorite is when babies look up from strollers in intersection crosswalks to wave at you.
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