N'awlins at heart

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Animal Planet is full of shit.

Yeah yeah yeah, we all know I love the animals. And with Cartoon Network out of commission, at least for us, I moved on to Animal Planet. It was a show about animals attacking humans. I was totally buying into their crap until they started spouting silliness.

They started out with the Black Bear. Their fact was a typical black bear measures up to 6 feet. They had an awesome animation that showed this measured on the bear. It was amazingly fascinating.

Next came the mountain lion. Often called a "panther, cougar, or puma". A mountain lion can measure up to 6 feet. And again with the graphic. Wait, what? 6 feet? As big as a black bear? Amazingly fascinating.

Next up was a Buck. During mating season a buck becomes a lot more aggressive. I wonder how big a full grown buck can measure. Guess what? A full grown buck can measure up to 6 feet. Yep, it sure can. I saw the graphic.

Now hold on a minute. A black bear, mountain lion, and freaking deer are not the same size animal. I don't care what your graphic says, they are 3 very different sized animals.

Up next is the american alligator. If they show me a graph depicting a 6 foot american alligator I'm gonna start making some angry phone calls.

Speaking of animals, W1 made a comment about a week ago that I did not reply to. That time. She stated the cat was way too tiny and we needed to fatten her up. Now I give her credit, there are 3 large things on our cat. Her eyes, her ears, and her ass. Other than that she is a very petite 2-3 lb kitty. But she is 15 years old, and has been a very petite 2-3 lb kitty her whole life.

So yesterday when she said it again I could not stay quiet. The poor cat has spent her entire life weighing 3 lbs tops, why is it all of a sudden bad? I'm sure by now her arthritis is starting to kick in, how mean would it be to add a few more lbs to her? Make her lug a fat ass body around for the final years.

In her defense W1 wanted to do it out of love. She planned on spoiling her with a lot more wet food and cat treats. Her heart was in the right place. I just found it amusing. I love you and our kitty my angel.


At 5:51 AM, Blogger Patti said...

My ass is fat?
Signed, Your Kitty

At 8:07 AM, Blogger Stalker v1.5 said...

3:51 am? wtf

At 8:41 AM, Blogger Patti said...

No, it was actually 5:51 am...

(for the record, the w/v was longer than my comment!)

At 6:17 PM, Anonymous Major Dad said...

heh. heh. He loves her and her kitty!

At 8:40 PM, Blogger Stalker v1.5 said...


At 9:42 PM, Blogger Patti said...

Hey, maybe you could get Animal Planet to come do a show on your cat - I'd love to see a six foot cat!


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