N'awlins at heart

Saturday, July 18, 2009

Facebook status.

I wanted to make my status "Michael is What the f**k is wrong with you people?". Just to do it. I won't, but I want to.

At the entrance to the parking garage at work we have what I call the cheese grater. You have to scan your badge and push through this contraption. On the outside is a poster that says "Tailgating is everyones problem..." It had a picture of a crocodile under water with the eyes and snout poking out. Then is goes on to say how we should report people scanning their badge and walking 2 people through at once.

So I was walking down the stairs in the parking garage at work and overheard an obvious rocket scientist. She says "Oh my god, is tailgating really such a problem here? I didn't realize there were so many people partying here at work, that you have to put up posters." Like people at grillin in the garage. Dumbass!

Last weekend we went to Wally World. What a high class of people we run into there. Literally. We are in an isle, and I'm stopped to the right. (Because this is America! Okay?) A lady is walking towards me on the right side, and out of nowhere she switches sides and stops leaving her cart directly in front of me with her kid in the basket area. Like maybe a foot away, tops. And I'm thinking "What the Hell is wrong with this idiot?". Once she grabs a few items she goes to keep moving around me, but rams the front of my cart. I guess I was supposed to get out of her way while she was gone or something. So I'm like "Um, what am I a mirage? What is wrong with this idiot?"

A few isles over I see her again. This time she leaves her cart in the middle of the isle where you can't pass on either side, and walks off to grab more crap. Well damnit I had to get past, so I made sure to return the favor and I rammed her cart out of the way. Hard! And her kid was like "Ow!" which made me laugh hysterically. And probably look like a psycho asshole to the other patrons who did not see our earlier interaction. But I don't care, it made me happy.

Tonight I finally decided to blog. I was going, I was in the flow, then suddenly the power went out. Must have been the terrible clear skies we've been experiencing. It flickered back on once or twice, just to make sure it takes out every piece of electronic equipment in the house, then it's down for the count. Luckily I can type on the laptop battery. Unfortunately I was at about 5% charge when it happened.

The worst part is, W1 was in the process of making cookies. They were on the baking sheet ready to go.

(Note: This was ready to be posted Thursday Night.)


At 11:50 AM, Blogger Stalker v1.5 said...

Now you gotta tell 'em why the power went out.

Did good at WalMart love, proud of you!

At 8:42 PM, Anonymous chia said...

ok. why'd the power go out????


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